HOW EVIL HYENAS TRIED TO KILL THE LION KING BUT FAILED: A SUSPENSEFUL FAIRY TALE FROM THE GREAT AGAIN FOREST

Hyenas knew they couldn’t directly confront the lion; they knew the lion would clean up the swamp where they had been thriving and deprive them of their rotten food. As soon as the Lion arrived, the hyenas realized their survival was threatened, and then the great hunt started.

They started by smearing the orange lion with whiny statements from 11 opportunistic gazelles that slept around with every animal in the forest. The gazelles tried to portray the lion as an evil predator, but the forest population didn’t believe the slotty gazelles and still made him the Lion King.

Hyenas were furious… They had to brainstorm what to do next. One of the smartest hyenas by the name Angry Shit said, “How about we tell the forest population that Lion King colluded with bears from the Siberian forest to steal our food and that the Lion King’s election was rigged by Siberian bears?” Hyenas rejoiced and told the parrots they controlled to repeat this lie to the entire forest to see if it sticks… But animals didn’t believe this lie and didn’t revolt against the Lion King.

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Hyenas got upset and told Angry Shit to shut up and not come up with stupid ideas anymore. Then some other hyenas came up with a better plan: they traveled to a faraway land in the East, to the dragon kingdom. Hyenas told the Great Dragon that they would open up the forest to the dragons to feast on anyone if the Dragon would sell them some very disease-carrying bats that carried a contagious disease. The Great Dragon was surprised and asked the hyena delegation, “Why would you want to buy disease-carrying bats from us? They carry this nasty disease and are not only useless but harmful.” Hyenas laughed in response and told the Great Dragon, “Well, dear friend, is it true that you don’t like the Orange Lion King because he is not letting you feast in our forest, correct?” “Yes, hyenas, that is true, I hate this evil Orange Lion!” “Well, then, dear friend, would you like us to help you get rid of the Lion King?” “Of course,” said the Great Dragon, “but how?” “Don’t you worry, dear comrade, we got a great plan, hahahaha… just sell us those bats and you will see…”

The intrigued Great Dragon gave the disease-carrying bats to hyenas and said, “I don’t want to know what you have in mind, but make sure it works, ok?” Hyenas rejoiced and took the bats with them in a cage.

As soon as they arrived back in the forest, hyenas released the bats into the wild. The bats began biting all the animals, and animals started getting sick. Some old and already sick animals died, but most of them just suffered flu-like symptoms and recovered fully. However, hyenas started spreading panic in the forest about the horrible pandemic of unknown origin spreading in the forest and threatening the survival of the species. Lion King tried to calm them all down, but panic prevailed. Hyenas told all animals to hide in their nests and dens and not to come out until Hyenas announce that it is safe.

Animals could not hunt and started starving, spreading great discontent among the forest population. Time came to re-elect the Orange Lion King. Animals still loved him and still voted for him to remain their King. Hyenas picked J Brandon, the oldest of all hyenas that pretended to be the most experienced one in rat hunting to be their candidate. In reality, the old J, as they liked to call him, was a parasite – he never hunted rats; he was just picking up the corpses that other animals donated to him and eating those corpses all his life.

J Brandon was hiding in his den, afraid to confront the Lion King. Most of the animals didn’t even know what he looked like, but many of them decided that it was the Lion King’s fault for not stopping the annoying disease and not letting them out to go hunting; they didn’t realize it was the hyenas who forced the animals to stay in their dens.

Hyenas devised a plan where parrots they controlled would vote for other animals who stayed in their dens fearing the disease; hyenas also invited some chimps from nearby forests to vote too even though they didn’t live in the Lion King’s forest… chimps got some fruits in exchange.

Soon enough, parrots announced that the Lion King lost the election and J Brandon, the oldest hyena, won. Hyenas rejoiced, they pulled the old J Brandon from where he was hiding, and Hyena reign began in the forest. Lion King exposed the Hyenas’ lies and manipulations, and other lions joined him and demanded that the election be redone.

Hyenas refused and brought in more hyenas to hunt down all the lions to stop the resistance to the Hyena’s reign. Hyenas managed to put some lions in cages, the others were tried by Kangaroo court for rebellion. Hyenas appointed the most obedient kangaroos to run the court proceedings, and the outcome was already predetermined: lions were guilty! Lion King kept fighting…

In the meantime, J Brandon, the fake hyena king, ordered to breed as many rats as possible to give to each forest animal at least one rat to make forest animals love hyenas and be grateful to hyenas.

While rats were being bred, J Brandon invited the Great Dragon and his monsters from the East to come and eat all the real food.

When that was finished, and dragons left, hyena king J Brandon announced that now that he is the king, all animals can come out of their dens and go hunting because the bat disease miraculously disappeared!

Animals came out, but there was a shortage of food because the Great Dragon was feasting while animals were hiding. The rat population went out of control, and each rat became smaller and of lesser quality; you needed more rats to survive, and hyenas didn’t have any more of those free rats, so animals had to keep hunting for small, scrawny rats instead of hunting for real prey, so the situation became untenable.

Animals realized that they had been cheated by the hyenas.

But hyena’s parrots kept spreading the lies that all is good in the forest. But one of the parrots, the smartest one by the name Mocker Cleverson, was brave enough to yell at the top of his lungs to the entire forest about hyenas’ evil deeds and exposed hyenas day and night…

Hyenas became very upset, and they kicked Mocker out of his nest in the center of the forest, and he had to build himself a smaller nest on the edge where not as many animals could hear him…

Lion King kept fighting, talking to many animals unhappy with hyenas’ rule, and asking them to rise up against the evil hyenas and their fake king J Brandon… Hyenas were furious that Lion King wouldn’t give up. King J Brandon and his hyenas’ council decided to put the Lion King in a cage. They convened various kangaroo courts that accused the Lion King of making bad weather, of stealing all the animals that the Great Dragon hunted, of hiding evidence of his own evil deeds, and of bribing the sluttiest of gazelles with prey that didn’t belong to the Lion King to keep her mouth shut about Lion King’s promiscuity… As kangaroos who were getting extra rats for convicting the Lion King joyfully announced one verdict against the Lion King after another, the high court of wise owls sitting at the very top of the forest canopy, seeing that hyenas weren’t motivated by the pursuit of justice but by selfish interest in putting the Lion King in a cage, canceled the kangaroo court ruling. Hyenas became furious again and tried to smear some of the owls and attack the High court of wise owls…

Hyenas huddled for a night-long meeting – all the most important hyenas gathered at the swamp headquarters: the Angry Shit, King J Brandon, the ugliest hyena Scummala Yaris who was supposed to replace the aging J Brandon, the hunt organizers Grossy Flea Mossy and Bad Luck Groomer; and the former hyena king that was the only black hyena of the pack – his name no one was allowed to pronounce…. King J Brandon had gotten so old that he would fall asleep from time to time, and when he’d wake up, he’d scream; “death to Lion King, death to Lion King” and then he’d go back to sleep again… The other hyenas panicked: no matter how they tried to make the orange Lion King go away, nothing worked. A new moon was coming and, per forest tradition, soon enough, unhappy forest animals were supposed to gather to name the new king because King J Brandon’s term was coming to an end. Hyenas realized that King J Brandon was too feeble to stay in power, but all other hyenas were too ugly and uncharismatic for the forest animals to choose as a new king. Scummala Yaris was next in line for succession, but being the ugliest one and the least popular one, she had no chance – even humans who came to the forest to find a few hyena specimens for the zoo didn’t want to take her…

There was one other hyena, who seemed a better fit, Goblin Gruesome, but his ideas were too extreme for the forest – he didn’t want animals to hunt anymore and wanted the hyena council to distribute all the prey equally to all animals and control their behavior to the most minor detail… Even some hyenas were scared of Goblin Gruesome and didn’t want him to be the king – the rest of the animals would never accept him…

What do we do? What do we do? – howled the hyenas all night, asking the moon for answers. Suddenly they heard the voice of one of the hyenas from the depth of the forest – they couldn’t recognize the voice, but it howled: “get the humans to kill him!”

Wow! Who is that genius hiding in the shadows of the deepest part of our forest? – exclaimed Grossy Flea Mossy and Bad Luck Groomer; Scummala started laughing uncontrollably, Angry Shit was so happy about the idea he took a dump right in front of the others, making them cringe; even fake king J Brandon woke up and asked if the meeting was over yet…

So it was decided, hyenas sent a dispatch to the nearby village and found some young human who liked to practice target shooting and told him that in the forest there is a perfect target for him, an orange lion king; that if he brings the lion’s hyde to the village, he would be made the village elder despite being so young. The kid was overjoyed and thanked hyenas for the opportunity.

Hyenas led the village idiot to where they knew the Lion King gathered animals loyal to him to get ready to take over the forest. Lions knew that most animals by then didn’t like hyena reign that was marked by devastation, hunger, and evil deeds by corrupt hyenas… The sail was in the Lion King’s wind after the highest court canceled kangaroo court convictions…

As Lion King was talking to the joyful crowd of lions and other animals; shots rang out. A young human fired his rifle and slightly wounded the Lion King but didn’t kill him. Angry hyenas pretending like they wanted to defend the lion king immediately tore the young human apart before he could tell who egged him on to kill the Lion King.

Lion King knew who was behind the attempt on his life. All animals of the forest were appalled by the hyenas’ evil deeds. Hyenas’ parrots screamed that it wasn’t hyenas who did it but no one believed them anymore. Forest animals wanted the Lion King back and were so disgusted with hyenas that they decided to drain the swamp where hyenas lived and asked the humans to come and take the hyenas for lab experiments. Cornered, hyenas went into attack mode, but humans shot them with tranquilizers and gathered their listless bodies, loaded them onto the truck, and drove away. Lion King became the king again, and forest animals rejoiced and began living happily ever after in the great forest with an abundance no one has ever seen before…

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About The Author

Dim Simple

Western society (and others who attempt to copy its modern trends) are on their way to extinction because western institutions are dominated by advocates of human parasites, and because western mainstream ideology is currently based on wealth redistribution that unsustainably caters to various groups of “professional victim – parasites.”